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Thursday, August 11, 2011

So stressed!!

Gosh, I am so stressed out right now.  It is getting very close to time when we take DD to college - only about one more week.  She is beginning to feel the pressure.  She's grumpy, quick to get upset, very emotional.  But she is still wanting to spend tons of time with me.  Even when she's "mad" at me, for some unknown reason, she still wants to spend time with me because she is leaving soon.  I appreciate that she wants to be with me, I love that we are so close & that she is going to miss me, but this is really beginning to stress me out.

I almost feel like she needs some time to herself to process through what she is feeling.  She doesn't want that at all though.  I also feel like it would help if she'd talk to me about what she is feeling and thinking.  She doesn't want that either.  It feels like she just wants to be miserable and share that with me.  I know this is a difficult time for her, I know she's nervous and a little worried about how college is going to be, I know that there are HUGE changes coming for her.  But I wish she'd work through it instead of taking it all out on me.

Part of the problem, probably a big part of the problem, is that DH is very tired from working a ton of overtime.  Usually he would be calming me down, talking me through the stress, offering tons of affection and other things to relieve my stress.  He isn't able to do those things right now though.  He's just too tired.  I respect that but it's still hard for me.  I want his help.  I miss his help.  I miss his affection.  It just feels like I'm doing this without him and I hate that.

Also, usually during stressful times, I would be doing lots of things that make me feel better - self care so to speak.  I can't really do that right now, though, because DD is wanting to spend every free minute with me.  I'm not even getting the sleep I should because she wants to stay up late and get up early.  I keep telling myself this is only for a week or so.  I know how blessed I am to have such a close relationship with DD and I need to remember that.  I'm just feeling stressed right now!!!

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